Some statements by Elias on Control, Appeciation,
Exposure and a new kind of Interaction
Guest: I suppose what comes to mind is acceptance of energy.
ELIAS: That is a prerequisite, but beyond the acceptance. For let me clarify, you may be accepting and that may not necessarily generate what you want, for it is dependent upon how you are expressing that acceptance. You may be accepting of yourself in the position and the energy that you are expressing, and you may also be accepting of the other individual in the position and the energy that they are expressing, but beyond that you also incorporate a want which is not necessarily being expressed in that moment, and you have identified what the want is.
Now, how do you accomplish that? Appreciation
You already incorporate the knowing in familiarity. As you express a genuine appreciation, as you move your attention from what is occurring in the interaction which is beginning to generate the conflict, you move your attention to yourself — not to the exclusion of your interaction or the other individual, but moving your attention to what you want.
You have identified you do not wish to disengage the interaction; you wish to alter the interaction in association with what you want. You want to be interconnected, to be experiencing a lack of conflict in that intertwining with the other individual, to experience that mergence.
The manner in which you accomplish this is to move your attention to appreciation, the appreciation of yourself and of the other individual, in genuineness. Not necessarily appreciation of what the other individual is expressing in that moment, for were you to be appreciating of that objectively, automatically, in automatic responses, you would be in agreement for sameness generates validation. And not that you would be appreciating of the behavior or the expression of the other individual, for you quite clearly acknowledge that you are not, for you wish to alter it. You are generating conflict within yourself, and you are aware of that also.
Therefore, you move your attention to some aspect of yourself and of the other individual, incorporating the scenario at hand, and allow yourself to discover some element that you may genuinely appreciate in that moment, and express it. That reconfigures the energy. It moves your attention, it alters your perception, and it alters your reality, for your perception has been altered. In that action, it reconfigures the energy of the other individual and therefore the energy that you express outwardly in response is different, which the other individual receives, and they shall alter their expression also.
You are perceiving this as the other individual not merely sharing, but commanding you to experience in like manner. Therefore, prior to your reception, you block and you do not allow yourself to genuinely receive OR reconfigure.
Now; in this, let me express to you, to receive, there is a prerequisite of exposing. This is what you may term to be the negative element of your truth of control. For in this truth, you do not allow yourself to expose — not entirely, but generally speaking — and if you do not expose, you do not receive. For reception requires an openness; to receive, you must allow an opening. Energy may be projected towards you, to you, but if you are not generating that exposure, you create a shield. Therefore, there is no genuine penetration.
Your energy field becomes your shield, rather than your window.
Now; this is a matter of perception, but perception is influenced by your beliefs. Therefore, if you are perceiving that the other individual is commanding you to be experiencing in like kind, although intellectually you may recognize it as an invitation, as a sharing and a participation, it matters not. For this also is an aspect of this turning point, in which addressing to this particular belief system individuals may begin to recognize and actually engage the action of moving these concepts from an intellectual understanding into a practical doing. It is a movement of perception.
Individuals naturally repel that expectation. You all incorporate this action. For you incorporate an intrinsic element of yourselves, knowing that you do direct yourselves or knowing that that is a natural movement, and recognizing that many times you are not directing yourselves, you are allowing other individuals to dictate your choices. The more information that you incorporate, the more you recognize this intellectually.
What becomes your snare is that objectively you begin to react rather than evaluate. Therefore, if another individual is sharing with you experiences or information, at times even if you are in agreement with them, you may repel, for you are generating challenge in attempting to genuinely be directing of yourselves. But this is an unfamiliar action, and therefore you move to extremes and you confuse yourselves, and you move in black and white — “I must be directing of myself continuously. Therefore, no other individual may suggest or express to myself any direction of what I shall do. I shall choose. This individual is expressing an invitation to myself to be appreciating of a landscape — no! I refuse, and I am expressing conflict within myself. I shall direct myself. If I wish to be appreciating the landscape, I shall. But it shall be MY choice.”
This is the rebellion that is raging, rather than the evaluation and the recognition of how the energy is being expressed by the other individual in genuineness. At times, another individual may be expressing in genuineness an attempt to be directing of you and an expression of expectation and commanding. But at times, they may not be expressing that type of energy.
Now you move into the action of evaluating, being aware of yourself, of what you want, of what your movement is and how you are receiving the energy, and allowing yourself to evaluate what is the genuine intention of this projection of energy. Which I am NOT suggesting to you that you incorporate tremendous time frameworks in analyzation of every interaction that you encounter with other individuals — “Is this individual being genuine? Shall I trust this expression? Is this individual attempting to manipulate myself? Are they attempting to command me? Are they attempting to direct me? Are they attempting to infringe upon my choices?” No, I am not expressing that you exhaust yourself with such acrobatics.
I AM expressing to you that you be aware of your own energy. This is your indicator. If you are reacting and if you are offering yourself these twinges, so to speak, that trigger an onset of conflict or irritation or anxiety, these are your indicators that you are generating some expression within yourself, and you may evaluate what you are responding to within yourself, which also many times offers you a clearer view of the energy that you are receiving from the other individual. Regardless of their tone, regardless of how they may be presenting objectively their expression, the energy shall be the most accurate, and you shall view that much more clearly if you are aware of what YOU are generating.
Your assessment initially was to express to myself, “This individual attempts to control the situation or myself, and I recognize that actually this a reflection and I wish to be controlling of her.” That is a generalization. It is correct in a general manner, but now move into more specifics in your identification. You have offered an umbrella, so to speak, a generalization.
Yes, generally speaking, in the scenario, you wish to be expressing what the other individual is expressing, and in some manners you are. Therefore, you have identified the general reflection. But more specifically what is occurring? You are recognizing the energy that is being projected. You are not yet paying attention to what YOU are doing and how you are shielding or rebelling, what the influence of that control is, what the influence of that belief is that you shield automatically. And you rebel and you project.
Regardless of whether you incorporate one word or even one action or not, your energy is projecting in response. Do not fool yourself into a thought process that the other individual is not aware, for they are, just as are you. (Chuckles) This is the source of your freedom, my friend.